Relationships can be stressful. Especially when both people work and then you add the fact that you may have children to care for. Sometimes one partner can begin to feel neglected. They may begin to feel that their feelings or needs are being put on the back burner, even when that is not necessarily the case. If you are finding yourself in this sort of situation right now, then please, continue reading. These tips will show you how to keep your relationship together.
First and foremost, you have to ask yourself; Is this relationship worth saving? You have to be absolutely sure that this is what you want. Most relationships can be salvaged, but if you say you want to make it work and then you do not put forth the effort, suffice to say, it will not work. Many people find themselves staying in a relationship or a marriage because of the children, or simply because they have been together for so long. That is not enough and it is not fair to either party involved. Making a relationship work takes commitment from both parties.
Next, you have to define the real problem, not just the symptoms. For instance, if someone has had an affair, then the affair is only a symptom of something much deeper. What led to the affair in the first place? Was it a lack of intimacy? Did that person feel that they had to seek out that intimacy elsewhere? A lack of true intimacy can sometimes lead to a straying spouse. In this example, they would need to deal with the lack of intimacy that led to the affair. That is the real problem. The affair is just a sad symptom of a real problem. When you finally begin dealing with core issues rather than trying to cure symptoms, that is when you are on the right track to saving your relationship.
Once this has been done, it is time to start sharing your thoughts. Yes, sharing. This means you have to also listen, not just talk. If it helps, hold your partner’s hand during the conversation. If you really want to save the relationship, let them know you are there for them. If your partner brings up a subject that hurts you, remember, they are only trying to clear the air and help make the relationship stronger. Do not get defensive.
Now that you have figured out the problem areas in your relationship, you can now work toward solving them. Once again, you will have to put forth the effort to make this work. If you need to spend more quality time together, plan a date night every week. Make it a point to spend at least one night each week, alone with your spouse. If communication is the problem, then set aside some time every night so that you can talk for a few minutes before going to bed. There is always a way and the time if you really want your relationship to work and to last.